Welcome to Day 4 of our Back-to-school week special. Today, we continue our countdown of Tom Asacker's Ten Truths with #4 and #3:

Truth Four - From Interesting to Interested

"It doesn’t matter what people think about you or your company. What matters is how you make people feel about themselves and their decisions in your presence."

"Take a look at 99.999% of all marketing communications, from Web sites and direct mail, to sales sheets and advertising. They're all SHOUTING . . . "Look at me!" "Am I great, or what?" "Buy me!" and other irritating noise that no one gives a damn about. This loud voice of business is completely out of touch with the subtle, more compelling voice in the heads of today's audience. Why? Because people aren't interested in you. They want you to be interested in them, and to show them how their association with you will help them feel better about themselves.

"I don't know why so many people and organizations get this wrong, but I have a guess. I think it's because being genuinely interested in others, and working to understand their feelings and motivations, is tough: it's imprecise, messy, and time consuming. It's much easier and faster to talk about something that we know a lot about . . . us and our stuff! We simply memorize all of the pertinent facts and then when it's time, flip the brain/mouth switch and out it pours.

"It's also easier to simply bury our heads and focus on getting things done, isn't it? "Five sales calls to make . . . better get hustling!" "Two ads to create, as well as a capability brochure and a direct mail piece. No time to think." "The company is measuring me on number of transactions. Slow down and listen? Yeah . . . right." But guess what? That's great news for you! Because by being other-focused and truly interested in your audience, you'll stand out. Simply because no one else is doing it.

"(...)If you want people to pay attention to your communication, you must tune into their frequency. Their current situation. Their anxieties, desires and fears. Establish an emotional bond based on your audience's feeling of finally having been understood by someone. Because if people feel that you are genuinely interested in them, they’ll be much more likely to open up and interact with you, and give you the information that you need. So stop, sit down and scrutinize every single piece of company communication, from sales presentations to annual reports. Do they speak to your audience in terms of what's most important to them? Do they speak with passion and caring and energy? Will they make their eyes grow wide and pulse quicken?"

Truth Three - From Capture to Attract

"Metaphors matter! They condition our sensibilities and behavior. Stop trying to force fit today's complex market environment into the outdated models of yesterdays' much simpler time."

"Peruse any business publication or be the proverbial fly on any organizational wall and you'll be repeatedly exposed to war and sports metaphors. You know: capture market share, armed with information, attack the competition, hit a homerun, go the distance, raise the bar, and so forth. It's difficult to change your thinking when you're surrounded by such inapt language. How can anyone treat customers like friends when they're consistently referred to as targets to be captured or territories to be conquered? How can you expect initiative taking, when managers are busy ordering the troops around and the troops are sitting around waiting for new marching orders? And how can you hope to build long-term, mutually beneficial relationships when you're busy hooking them and reeling them in."

"I've got news for you: Business is not war and it is not a sport. That's yesterday's worn-out thinking again. And by continuing to speak yesterday's language, you are unwittingly sustaining yesterday's ineffective actions."

"(...) Metaphors do a lot more than simply enrich your speech. They structure your thinking. They condition your sympathies. They direct your attention and influence your decisions and actions. James Autry, retired CEO of Meredith Corporation wrote: Becoming a manager has much to do with learning the metaphors; becoming a good manager has much to do with using the metaphors; and becoming a leader has much to do with changing the metaphors."

"The marketplace is not an objective process, like a physical science where you try to influence the behavior of chemicals in a beaker or balls on a pool table. Appealing to customers is a subjective blend of art and science, where you're subtly attempting to influence feelings (and thus, behavior). You're dealing with the perceptions and actions of intelligent, curious, socially influenced human beings. People whose preferences change constantly, especially in the United States of Extravagance. So stop looking at business as chemistry, physics or mathematics, and begin seeing it for what it really is: a study in social psychology."

"When asked what single event was most helpful to him in developing his theory of relativity, Einstein answered: "Figuring out how to think about the problem." With his enlightening answer in mind, here's a mental model to help you think about your problems and stay aware of and adapt to the increasing number of sudden and unexpected shifts in the marketplace:

"Think of yourself as a magnet, and your audience as iron filings. You could either say that you - the magnet - cause the iron filings to move towards you. Or you could say that the iron filings value movement towards you. Scientifically speaking, both statements are exactly the same. But metaphorically speaking, they are very different. To believe that you cause your audience to move towards you implies certainty. To believe that your audience values movement towards you implies preference.

"By adopting the cause-and-effect metaphor, you’ll have a tendency to follow formulaic thinking, even in the face of changing customer preferences and declining business. In 1999, The Gap reported profits of over $1 billion. Two years later, they lost close to $8 million. How? What happened to all of their loyal customers? What was going on in their world and why? The Gap should have been obsessed with finding out, and I'm not even sure that they were curious. Instead, they focused on their own world. They continued to pour money into television advertising, assuming it to be a formula for causing sales. It's a common mistake.

"Our assumptions - our mental models - determine what we see. We think we know what's going on and what the solutions are, and so we filter out everything that doesn't fit our way of thinking.

"Stop filtering and start rethinking your business problems. You can begin by dropping the words "loyalty" and "retention" from your lexicon. Why? Because repeat patronage was never anything more than a series of mutual concessions. (...) It has absolutely nothing to do with loyalty. It has to do with staying tuned in to your audience’s changing preferences."

See you guys tomorrow, when we will finish the week with the remainder of Tom's truths.

Have a great Thursday, everyone.

Welcome to Day 2 of our back-to-school special feature. We're focusing on Tom Asacker's Ten Truths all week, and counting down to #1. Today, we are going to take a look at Truths #8 and #7:

Truth Eight: From Honesty to Authenticity

"People today are incredulous of marketing, institutions and the media. The only way to suspend disbelief, cut through skepticism and create trust is to act as a real human being and get to the truth. As the sages say: "Words that come from the heart can enter the heart.

"What the business world needs now is a return to the idea of amateur spirit. Now, it’s probably not the amateur spirit as you may think of it. The definition of amateur has evolved for the worse over the past few hundred years, coming to represent a dabbler or incompetent. The original spirit of amateur was a positive, noble tag to apply to someone (the Latin root for amateur is "amator," lover). An amateur pursuit was one you did for love, with a spirit of passion and authenticity. And it certainly didn't imply a lack of skill. Thomas Jefferson was an amateur writer and philosopher when he drafted the Declaration of Independence.

"Organizations - actually the people in them - must recapture this amateur spirit. Not because it is morally right, but because it's the only way to succeed in a world stunned by scandals and greed-is-good ideology. Ask yourself these simple questions: Do you want customers and employees to come to you first - and stay with you? Do you want them to recommend you to their friends and associates? Then you have to get them to do what? Trust you. And how do you go about doing that in a post-Enron economy? Certainly not by saying, "Trust me." That kind of talk immediately causes people to put up their defenses. Instead, you must get them to believe! Success today all boils down to belief. "Who should I believe? Who can I believe?" These are the critical questions. You must be believed to have any chance of success.

"But I have some bad news: No one will believe you. That’s right. In today’s court of public opinion, you are guilty until proven innocent. It’s the harsh business reality of our time. But there is a way to quickly transcend this reality. Here’s how: Within the first few seconds of meeting you or being exposed to your communications, your audience will form an impression that is easily reinforced and unlikely to change. They’ll observe your mannerisms, voice, choice of words, etc. and judge whether you are worth listening to. To cut through their innate disbelief - and very short attention span -simply push past your comfort level and be authentic! Amazingly, that’s all there is to it. Simply take off your mask - your title, your expertise, your bureaucratic language and technical jargon - and connect with them with honest, simple, and engaging language. Be on the level. Be moved to candor. Tell them what you believe and what you think. Speak the unspoken.

"(...) Say what you mean. Mean what you say. And don’t be mean when you say it. Don’t be defensive. Lighten up. Children have an inherent sense of honesty and humor that adults adore. It’s this authentic nature that you connect with. It doesn’t connect with you because it’s cute. It connects because it’s true. And you know it. So listen to your innocent, inner voice. Be childlike. Speak in a language that is natural, open, and honest. Get rid of all of the hype and toss in a dash of self-deprecating humor. State what you feel in a candid and caring, yet unapologetic way. And never - never - hide anything. People will then believe that you are being straight with them (warts and all), and as a result, you’ll be worthy of their trust.

"Daniel Boorstin wrote: "The amateur is not afraid to do something for the first time." And that's the measure of great artists, great lovers, and great entrepreneurs (not to mention children). To say, "I don't know." To ask the hard question that is on your mind (in a soft way). To take risks. To be bold. To state what you are feeling, openly. To admit your weaknesses. To adopt this amateur spirit takes courage and demonstrates your love for - and connects you on an emotional level with - your audience. They’ll believe you. It will demonstrate your trust in them, and your desire to eliminate their fears and their concerns. And it will inspire them and engender trust because it rings true."

Truth Seven: From Doing To to Doing With (and For)

"No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care. And it doesn't take a genius to tell the difference between someone who listens in order to get something, and someone who listens because she cares.

"(...) Business is no longer a simple cause and effect, transactional, quota-driven environment. Now it's all about trust and involvement - relationships. And relationships are messy. Relationships are hard to quantify. Relationships take time.

"(...) We like to believe that control is a good thing - an attribute of a strong individual. In our upside-down way of thinking, we assume that by being in control, we can prevent bad surprises and get precisely what we desire out of life. We're convinced that control keeps people secure and in their places, thereby preventing us from being disappointed by them. But nothing could be further from the truth. The need for control comes from weakness or insecurity. It is fear-based, plain and simple. Fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of being judged by others, fear of intimacy, fear of loss, fear of not making quota. And this fear is what prevents us from discovering our true passion and purpose. It prevents us from doing what we do best and letting others do what they do best. It stifles people's growth and eventually pushes others away from us.

"(...) Control destroys relationships. Control blinds you to opportunities. Control shuts down your inner voice. Control is driven by your ego's need to serve itself. Control is an illusion you cling to primarily to alleviate your fears. Leaders give up the need to control, come to terms with their own egos, and dedicate themselves to helping others. They inspire. They embrace change. They accept the uncertainty of the future. They trust people and help them live their dreams.

"(...) As Gandhi said: "Be the change you want to see in the world." You don't have to be part of the world that emphasizes the pursuit of wealth, reputation and conventionality. Instead, be other-focused and have boundless empathy for human frustration and suffering. Stop listening to your weak, cynical and selfish inner voice that tells you that it's "their problem." You're much greater than that. Let your mind go and feel and understand with your heart and gut. Don't be quietly cynical or apathetic. Don't push or persuade. Be open, optimistic, compassionate, and kind. Help people feel better about themselves and their place in the world. Because the true measure of success is not what people think about you nor how many people know your name, but how many people's lives you've touched."

Tomorrow, we'll look at #6 and #5: Going from facts to storytelling, and from branding to bonding.

Have a great Tuesday, everyone. :)

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